just when i thought i had it all together

i finally named the 5th squid (princess zelda)

and we got 6 more in today. le sigh.


suggestions are appreciated

ze squid

ok, so about this new job of mine.

joey, my dear friend of many years, is quite smart. in fact, much more so than i. for this reason, Kaplan hired him to teach MCAT classes for $20/hr. that's ballin.

but joey already had a job. and he needed to name a replacement. and that lucky replacement? CORRECT! me. so, i am the official squid breeder of the "Stabb Lab" [thats right. my boss is dr. stabb. the squidologist.]

so, i am solely [with about 6 other people, all with much more important titles than mine--one girl is called the squidmaster--and they do way more important things than i do] responsible for the lives of 6...nay, 5 [we recently lost jezebel] adult squid and around 8 clutches of squid eggs. you can imagine how high-stress this environment is, what with all of these lives hanging in the balance....

i have named all but one of them so far. i refuse to let ashley name any more of them, cause the last one she named died. anyway, here they are, with some interesting facts about each.

161: Bill Clinton. bad at hiding. has inked on me more than once. biggest one. male. ripped jezebel's head off while they were mating on valentine's day.
162: Dwight K. Schrute. alpha male. insatiable. jackhammer. also bad at hiding. inked on me today.
169: Yuengling. female. young. made it through the valentine's day mating with Dwight. hoping she'll lay soon.
165: Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. our heaviest egg-layer thus far. also inked on me today.
168: hiding from me. has yet to be named. suggestions welcome by all [except ashley]
164: the late Jezebel: quite the hussy. doesnt even bother to hide in the sand. bill clinton ripped her head off on vday.

more to come on the squid saga. today i spilled a bucket of de-ionized water on myself.

valen-TIME

ok, ok i know mostly my posts are witty and utterly hilarious, but this one's a bit sappy.


i had a freakin awesome valentines day. and i want my faithful blog readers to know about it.

i had a pretty fantastic day, what with the class, and the squid [oh, i cant WAIT to tell you about my new job!] and my date with ashe [ice cream and sparkly tats-oh my!] but the night was fantastic.

so, in keeping with his constant air of "mysterious boyfriend", Mike wouldnt tell me what the plan was for valentine's day, just that he was cooking dinner for me. so, i arrived at his apartment with pie [i said that i would bring desert] and he had not only made me dinner, but set up a tent in their living room so that we could go camping. cause its too cold to go outside. and since we couldnt go outside, there were christmas light "stars". honestly. adorable. seriously. i usually hate valentines day.

things that i learned today

and i didnt learn either in class:

1. how to post and item on the facebook

2. the orbit bus makes me want to punch a baby. if you have a baby, keep it far from me when i must ride an orbit bus.

kittiz

so, i'm sure you all know [ashe] that emma gave kitti back to amy.

and i miss him.

terribly. i mean, i had really fallen in love with the hateful little thing. and i think that God himself is trying to tell me that i need another kitti.

why else would facebook [God's gift to stalkers everywhere] have invited me to a group entitled "KITTENS!" containing temptations like this:

http://uga.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=40820899&o=all&op=1&view=all&subj=8171595558&aid=-1&id=4904100&oid=8171595558

i just dont know. so, if you love me, youll talk me out of this kitti that God wants me to have.

new years resolution

so, i know i havent blogged in awhile. sorry to all of my faithful readers [ahem, ashley]

my new years resolution is not, however, to blog more often. sorry [ashe]

it is not to get in shape, to be more organized, to manage my stress, or to eat better either.

it's to try not to accidentally almost kill my friends.




so. on new years eve, i innocently attended a small get-together at the boy's apartment. [the boys being sean, joey, matt and drew.]

we had a lovely time, and though i opted not to drink, it was tunz uv fun. anyways, at some point, joey had the brilliant idea that we go to waffle house for a snack. i opted to go, being as i was the only elligible driver. joey soon opted out of going, leaving some others of us to go, each thinking the others planned to eat, when really, none of us did. once we arrived, travis ate, but the other 4 of us only had water.

this is not the point, however. upon arriving at the apartment complex, sean g [whose car i was driving] asked me to pop his trunk for him. i obliged, but on the first go-around, i popped his hood instead. as i was on my way to close the hood, however, the cutest puppy in the history of puppies flew into my arms as if sent to me by God himself. so, being a puppy lover [read: female] i oohed and aahed and cuddled and baby talked to this puppy like i had lost my everloving mind. i then returned it to its rightful owner and returned to the party.


the next evening as i was watching the Sugar Bowl after show [around 1 am] i got a distressed phone call from sean g. seemingly, he had nearly died when his hood flew up as he was driving down hwy 316 toward Emory.

and that is why in 2008, i pledge not to accidentally almost kill my friends.

n00b.w00t.

so, yesterday ony my way to school, i was driving along at a fairly reasonable speed all things considered [i had JUST woken up] when i realized that i was being quite closely by an individual on a scooter. seriously?! you're going to tail me on your scooter?! what happens if i brake-check you?? i'll tell you! you'll end up sitting on my tailgate wearing that ridiculous tophat that i keep in my trunk on top of your helmet nursing two broken legs and my broken window!!!!

and dont get me STARTED on the fact that you were able to keep up with me on that thing!!! i mean, i realize that my 87-year-old grandmother who can barely read her speedometer drives faster than me most days [the other night i noticed an officer pointing his radar gun at me, and when i looked down at my speedometer i was going 30 in a 35 but i mean it was in the right lane on Prince and it was late at night and there could have been a pedestrian in a crosswalk or something, i mean really] but clearly you havent been reading my blog religiously, because if you had, you would very well know that i was a witness to a near-tragic scooter-accident recently.

be careful on that thing




speaking of accidents, i really like it how on this radio station that i have recently become addicted to, they call a fender-bender a "two-car insurance seminar"



and, one more thing, joey [shorts4life@blogspot.com] is funny, i guess.

"i saw you and cristina walking and i just wanted to let you know to hang your towel out the left side. yeah, that's the Crip side"